GarageGabs

Ok, I don’t usually delve into the world of soccer, but this story is too good to pass up. Milan soccer player Marco Borriello recently failed a drug test after a match with Roma. Now, you’ve heard all the excuses in the world for failed drug tests; “I didn’t intentionally take the substance”, “It is strictly for my asthma”, or “I just thought it was cream for my joints”. I guarantee you’ve never heard this excuse.

Borriello shows up in court with his girlfriend Belen Rodriguez and claimed that he tested positive for ingesting a cream that Rodriguez used to cure a vaginal infection. Did he brush his teethe with it you wonder? No, apparently, Borriello unintentionally ingested the cream while servicing her “area”.

I gotta say, I’m impressed. Yeah, going down when biscuits are being baked is nasty. But, the nads it took to walk into a room and say “Your Honor: She is the reason I tested positive”…..That in itself deserves at least an investigation. If she can produce the cream (I don’t think a yeast sample is necessary) I’d let Borriello slide on effort alone.

The Yeast He Can Expect Is A 3 Match Ban (The Rumourwhore)

This Week In Soccer: At Last, Consequences For Taking A Dive (Deadspin)

Belen Rodriguez e il doping di Borriello (Excite Italia) This is probably my best source, but appears to be in Italian. No offense to Deadspin.

Belen’s Calender Definitely worth a look.

*UPDATE* Ok, thanks to the modern marvel that is google translate I was able to translate the Excite story into a somewhat understandable version.

Translated Version

In the story, Rodriguez notes:

“The physical contact has been fatal. Indeed lethal. Mark s’ is taken my same infection and without second thought I have advised it to use the cream to the cortisone that my doctor had prescribed to me. Later on the anti-drug test that it has made, evidenced just cortisone presence.

I really hate to ruin the accidental ingestion thing, but according to Rodriguez, Borriello acquired her infection(I assume through sex) and then used the cream on purpose. Still a good story, but not quite as good as the whole biscuit diving thing.

This new bit of information does lead me to wonder how exactly Borriello used the cream.  I thought these creams were for rubbing on the infected area.